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Are you standing at a life-defining crossroads, where the quiet yearning inside has grown impossible to ignore—the call to create, to bring your words to the light of day, and to uncover the purpose that speaks to the deepest truths of who you are?
Midlife will do that to you. It will plop you right down on your ass at that crossroads, demanding that you strip away the distractions and take stock of your life. Then it will toss you a shovel, demanding that you dig deeper to find meaning and to excavate what still lies buried within you.
So you dig. And each shovelful of detritus is symbolic of what the second half of life is asking you to leave behind:
Here’s the truth…We didn’t mean to lose ourselves. We got swept up in the relentless current of the first half of life—raising children, building careers, and holding up the sky for everyone we loved. And in doing so, we quietly let our own dreams and creative aspirations gather dust. (Hell, maybe we buried them in the backyard under our prize-winning roses.) That’s what the first half of life is all about, so we can cut ourselves some slack.
But here is the beautiful invitation of midlife: We can “…go back & pick up the bits and pieces that we left behind—gifts, talents, capacities, interests, & passions. ~ James Hollis
As we continue to dig, all of that surface layer stuff that’s no longer so meaningful begins to blow away. It simply has no heft and can’t abide. And as we go deeper, we hit the rich, loamy soil—where those “bits & pieces you’ve left behind” lay dormant.
Well, actually…not so dormant. You’ve been hearing its whisper. And now that your children have flown the nest, or your once-thriving career has lost its spark, or life’s unexpected challenges have left you reeling, it’s likely become more like a deep, relentless rumble. Write. Create. Use your Voice. That call is coming from the part of you that has waited, patiently yet persistently, to rise into the light, to be seen and known, and to be fully brought into being.
All the Buts…
The most common reason folks give for not writing is some variation of “It’s not the right time” or “I don’t have time.” But even when we strip away the illusion of time and prioritize what truly matters, they’re faced with an even fiercer battle—the relentless struggle to “apply ass to chair” and push through the thick wall of resistance that keeps them from simply sitting down and doing the work.
Yet, beneath the surface of this struggle lies a far more daunting challenge—one that plagues every creator. It’s not just about doing the work; it’s about facing the deeply buried fears that whisper: Who’s going to care about what I have to say? And…Will anyone even understand me? These questions, often left unspoken, gnaw at the very core of our creative souls, threatening to keep our words locked away.
To make matters worse…
We unknowingly allow the gatekeepers into our monkey minds and their voices are truly deafening. Who are the gatekeepers? Editors, agents, publishing houses, oh my—wonderful, well-meaning, talented people, yes, but during the creation phase, their presence can be downright destructive. This is not the time to let their daunting questions echo in your mind:
- Will this make the NYT bestseller list?
- Do you have a platform of 9 gazillion followers?
- What is your publication history?
- Could it be turned into a Netflix series?
- What is your marketing plan?
If you don’t have the answers, they may as well whisper straight into your soul, “Why even bother?” If you listen to that whisper, you’re already self-defeated and creatively paralyzed, and what you’re trying to quarry will end up six-feet deeper than it was before.
If any of this resonates with you, I’m here to tell you…
It’s time… Time to let your authentic expression emerge and reclaim the creativity that has always been within you, waiting patiently beneath the noise, the beautiful distractions, & the fear.
But how do we reconcile our desire for the bestseller list with our desire to find our own authentic voice and to share our own truth? I think we have to ask ourselves this question before we venture into the journey. Am I willing to sacrifice the raw, unfiltered essence of what I truly long to share so that I can fit into a mold that was never meant to hold my unique expression?
If the answer is “yes”, then you’ll begin by trudging through formulaic guides like How to Write Your Book in 5 Seconds? This path means ticking boxes, meeting external expectations, and likely throwing out your authentic voice altogether.
I’ve found another path that feels like a whole lot of joy, freedom, and balm to the creative soul. One that encourages you to find your authentic voice and create art for art’s sake, no matter what society tells you. One where the process matters—the self-discovery, the evolution, the transformation. For nothing short of transformation happens when you mine your inner landscape to create from a deeper place and let your True Self—your Soul—take up the “pen” or put fingers to keyboard.
Here’s the truth: What you’re really wrestling with in midlife is the process of reclaiming your creativity by mining your inner gold.
The creation phase is NOT the time for gatekeepers, inflated egos, or the persona of a NYT best-selling author. That’s part of the blockage that keeps the words from flowing. Don’t worry, we’re not letting go of our dreams of hitting it big, but that phase comes later, when it’s time to give your ego a bigger role in getting your work into the world.
Right now, in the act of creating, it’s about grabbing your own tools and digging deep enough to uncover something real and raw. This is where you’ll find the most authentic art, the kind of art that transforms you—and by extension, transforms others.
Spoiler Alert: That authentic art that transforms yourself and others??? THAT is precisely what those glorious gatekeepers are looking for, by the way. (But again…this isn’t the time to be thinking of them.)
As a midlife creator, you’re standing on the edge of a rich, untouched vein of inner gold, waiting to be excavated. The tension you face is, on one hand, you’re being called to mine this inner authenticity, to dig down into the layers of your soul untouched by external expectations. On the other, you’re tasked with shaping what you unearth into something the world can hold, admire, and buy—a polished artifact ready for the marketplace.
This clash—between the raw, unrefined gold of your True Self and the polished product demanded by the marketplace—can paralyze your creative process if the weight of public perception seeps into the act of creation itself.
And…you definitely don’t want to allow the audience’s gaze to infiltrate your sacred work during this process of excavation, or the gold will remain buried, unreachable. Your creativity will stall, trapped beneath the pressure of shaping your inner riches into something your mom will like, your friends will gush over, your colleagues will admire, and Penguin Random House will say “hell yes” to, before it’s even fully uncovered.
On top of this, there’s the shame that can creep in, that feeling of raw vulnerability of revealing your deepest treasures—your soul’s unpolished ore—to a world that may overlook or undervalue it, or gasp…critique it. This fear, this sort of trembling at the edge of exposure, can feel like an unbearable risk.
Yet this is the artist’s ancient calling: to brave the depths, to keep mining for truth even when it feels too raw, too close to the bone. It’s the artist’s work to bring forth what is timeless and hidden, and to offer it, transformed, to the light of day, where it may finally be seen and felt.
The beauty is, you don’t have to mine alone. Each of us has an inner companion, a guiding presence shining the brightest headlamp, illuminating paths we’d otherwise miss. This companion speaks to us constantly—through our triggers, our dreams, and even our art itself when we learn how to listen to it.
This inner companion, whether we call it our soul, our psyche, or our muse, is the very source of that elusive flow state, guiding us to unearth that vein of inner gold. It seeks only to help us, to take the lead in this excavation, and when we let it, we align with that force that knows exactly where to dig.
Ink & Insight: Excavate Your Inner Gold, Unearth Your Creative Passion & Craft a Fulfilling Second Half of Life
What gets in the way of the digging and doing the deep work of creating art? Beyond the obvious…technology, social media, and cleaning the grout in the shower (which is what becomes absolutely critical to me the moment I sit down to write…and I don’t even have grout), is that you haven’t set up an unassailable container. And this is crucial. When you’re sitting, fingers poised over the keyboard, the only two “people” present should be you and your Inner Companion. Mining is messy. You’re not trying to make it pretty, revising every sentence until you’re left with ten words, though you initially wrote five hundred. And…you’re not emailing it to your critique group either. This isn’t the time to hear, “Hey, your memoir is great, but you should add an alien in chapter three.” The other entity that’s not invited into the container is your Inner Critic. I don’t know about yours, but mine is an asshole. The sacred container contains only: You and Your Soul. Period. And it becomes a spiritual practice, regardless of your spiritual or religious beliefs.
Shadow Work
How can you reveal your authentic voice if vast parts of you are hidden below the surface, buried in the unconscious? How can you craft genuine characters, or reflect your True Self in your work, if so much of what drives you is unexplored? And those fears—the ones about failing or even succeeding—where do they hide out? That’s right…deep in your shadow, waiting to be unearthed.
And here’s something that is absolutely critical: Shadow Work isn’t something you can do on your own with a book or worksheet. Your clever ego will only let you scratch the surface. So, whether you work with me or someone else, find someone truly trained to help you go deep—someone who knows the terrain of shadow and can guide you safely through it.
Emotional Alchemy
Emotional Alchemy is essential to writing from the True Self. Without excavating our personal experiences and emotions—feeling them rather than bypassing them—we can’t tap into that raw, emotional core. As Robert Frost said, “No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader.” To which I would add, “No catharsis in the writer, no catharsis in the reader.” Because let’s be honest: if your writing lacks emotion and emotional transformation, it’s lifeless. It’s filler. I’ll go further: It’s absolute garbage. No one cares. Imagine if A Christmas Carol ended with Ebenezer Scrooge, having met his three ghosts, caught glimpses of his life’s choices, and having seen the fate of poor Tiny Tim…only to remain the same bitter, curmudgeonly, miserly man. The story would have no impact, no soul, no reason to exist.
If we’re not actively engaging with our own emotions and embracing the highs and lows of a true emotional life, we can’t create writing that resonates deeply either. Carl Jung said: “Without emotion, there can be no transformation.” This is the essence of powerful writing. Whether you’re crafting fiction or personal reflections, it’s the emotional depth and genuine transformation that elevates your work and make it unforgettable.
Dream Interpretation
Dream Interpretation? For many, it’s surprising to learn that one of the richest veins of creative insight comes from our dreams. Our Inner Companion speaks to us through dreams, offering a hidden map to our inner landscapes. By digging into these nightly messages, we tap into a deep well of symbolism, hidden truths, and inspiration that lie just beneath the surface.
Dreams speak in symbols and metaphors, brimming with meaning and layers. By interpreting these symbols, you gain access to a unique, symbolic language that can add depth and resonance to your storytelling. It’s a powerful tool to uncover themes and ideas that may be lying dormant, waiting to be explored more fully in your work. And perhaps most importantly, dream work connects you to timeless archetypes and universal story patterns that captivate readers on a deep, subconscious level.
Mining the rich terrain of your dreams can unearth precious material, giving your writing the weight and depth that only comes from tapping into the hidden reserves of the unconscious.
If you haven’t gathered by now, Ink & Insight is not your typical writing program, and it certainly doesn’t follow the formula for churning out a book in 5 seconds, managed by keyword-driven aspirations for Amazon bestseller status in obscure categories like: Alpaca / Yarn / Red.
Rather, it’s a deeply transformational experience meticulously designed for individuals in the midlife season who are ready to rekindle their neglected passions, resurrect dormant talents, and unveil the True Selves that have been shrouded in the midst of life’s chaos.
If you’re wondering whether I myself have stood on the edge of that rich, untouched vein of inner gold and felt the unbearable risk of raw vulnerability and exposure, the answer is a resounding “yes.”
The first half of my life was a relentless cycle of creating for others, of tirelessly building their dreams and helping them soar. To be clear, those years were profoundly rewarding, filled with accomplishments and joy, and a deep love for my clients. Yet this dedication and ceaseless effort came at a cost—the surrendering of my own creative genius and my own deep longing to write.
After what I can only describe as my “dark-year-and-a-half-to-two-years of the soul” (let’s not get it twisted, it’s far longer than a mere “dark night of the soul”)—a period marred by the profound losses of loved ones, grueling health struggles, and an MFA program that nearly crushed my identity as a writer, I had a deep epiphany. I realized there were hidden depths within me waiting to be unearthed and an inner permission that I urgently needed to grant myself in order to follow my longing to create. And even more than that, to allow myself and my work to shine.
For over a decade, my unwavering passion has been helping writers bring their stories to life. My own love affair with writing began at the tender age of 8 when I penned my first tale about witches with carbuncles. My voracious appetite for reading across genres, and obtaining a Bachelors degree in English/Creative Writing and an MFA, only fueled my passion for the power of writing.
My qualifications extend beyond writing alone and encompass a multifaceted approach to mentoring. In 2013, I embarked on a transformative journey of coach training, beginning with Martha Beck’s Wayfinder life coach program in 2013. I then went on to become a certified Equus coach and a master-certified Jungian Depth coach, adding profound layers to my ability to facilitate personal growth and transformation. My diverse background in writing and my extensive coach training form a unique and dynamic combination that sets me apart.
Throughout my career, I’ve had the privilege of assisting authors in achieving remarkable milestones, including securing coveted spots on prestigious lists like the New York Times and USA Today bestsellers. I’ve witnessed the birth of thriving businesses that were sparked by the writing of their books (yes, even memoirs), and the subsequent prosperity that comes with finding their purpose. Yet, as significant as these achievements are, I’ve come to recognize that the most profound transformations occur at a much deeper level.
The heart of our collaborative work lies in the true catharsis that takes place and I act as a guide and a compassionate witness to the inherent force within you—a force that is whole and complete. I am a meaning maker and a pattern recognizer, with a distinct ability to perceive and intricately weave together the seemingly disparate threads in your writing into the most exquisite tapestry imaginable.
This Program Is For You If:
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Testimonials & Book Acknowledgements
“…Melanie is an absolute badass developmental editor and aunty to stray animals (and authors struggling with writer’s block). Melanie’s process helped me to unlock my story and share the stories of others, so that everyone reading (and listening) to this book can feel seen and heard while healing their Busy Brains. Every Friday afternoon, your wisdom and laughter helped me to edit my writing and magically gifted Rahja more doggy comfort food. This book was born because of your consummate professionalism and editorial skills—thank you for being my book shaman.”
“Melanie Bates… Thank you for being the daily sounding board for the ideas that bubbled up as I researched and wrote this book. Transmuting fuzzy thoughts into language people can understand is no small task, but you made it feel like a picnic. I loved learning all this with you by my side, and I will always consider this book part yours. You once told me it was part of your calling to help me bring my message into the world, and darling – phew! We’ve done it. Thank you.”
“Melanie Bates was a kind and astonishingly efficient editor and organizer for this project. Thank heavens I was led to her.”
“Melanie Bates, you are so gifted, talented, and full of wisdom. You truly are a book shaman. Thank you for your coaching, your feedback, your editing, and your incredible support and partnership with this book, I could not have done it without you.”
“Working with Melanie Bates as my Book Launch Manager for The Joy of Genius was a great experience for me and all the members of my team. She exceeded my expectations, and I don’t get to say that very often.”
“Coaching with Melanie is like having a spiritual mentor, best friend, business strategist and champion by your side. She gives you permission to do what you truly want, have what you deeply deserve, and BE who you were born to be. She is the person I call when I need a reminder of who I really am.”
“I am in awe of the person I have become since working with Melanie. I just completed my last session and although deeply saddened as our time together has come to an end, I am walking into my new life with direction and a confidence I sorely lacked five months ago… In addition to fulfilling her commitment to me, through my writing, I was able to heal so many years of emotional suffering. Melanie’s authenticity, nurturing love and well-honed intuition provided her with a deep soul knowing of exactly what I needed and when I needed it. She simply took my lead and my hand and guided me with amazing gentleness to the most unexpected and healing results. I will be forever grateful to her and whatever entity brought us together.”
“One of the gifts Melanie brings to coaching sessions is her willingness to help me see the difference between what I believe I ‘should do’ and what I feel called to do. Melanie has the courage to ask tough questions when she’s aware that even though I may not feel entirely comfortable with my answer, I may be ready to open up to it. In our sessions I felt understood and listened to, as well as challenged in good ways. I asked to work with Melanie because I’m endeavoring to listen more to my body’s and soul’s voices than to my mind’s expectations. Melanie delivers exactly this kind of coaching…My life mission has been blessed by working with Melanie.”
“Working with Melanie as a business coach has been invaluable. She has provided insight on everything from book writing and TEDx speaking to webpage wisdom. What I love most about Melanie is that she sees you as your truest self, your highest form. And she helps you see yourself that way, too.
Melanie is an awesome listener and is able to use laser focus in determining next best steps, even when you are still in the stumbling phase. She guides with grace. I’m grateful to know her and have her in my corner.”
“Melanie’s authenticity, personal views and way of operating her business—of being in the world—have all encouraged me to look more within than without—to deal with criticism more evenly, to feel more confident in my expression/choices and, even when I get it wrong, to shrug my shoulders more when mistakes happen. As we moved through the business coaching sessions, we established an expression for my business that was a good fit for my natural talents and personal ‘soapbox.’ Writing the content for the new website was a joy and, with Melanie’s assistance, grew in depth and clarity. I found such value in Melanie’s intuitive ability to pull out the perfect tool at the right moment and her sense of when we had touched on what was authentic, deep and meaningful. As a lifelong Virgo striving for perfection, usually through embracing difficulty as a badge of courage, Melanie showed that there was another way: intimate, intuitive, trusting and relaxed. If you want an authentic, fun, intuitive and generous coach, then do choose Melanie.”
“Choosing to work with Melanie Bates was hands-down, bar none, the best decision I could have made for myself and for my book. I honestly don’t know if I would have ever finished my book without her caring guidance and support. She was truly with me every step of the way—from the scary beginning until the triumphant finale! The accountability that our weekly calls provided made sure to keep me on track and moving forward. I would wholeheartedly recommend Melanie to anyone even thinking about writing a book.”
“Melanie Bates, what a blessing you have been in my life, for my business, and with my book. Your partnership, support, feedback, editing, and vision helped this come alive – it would not have happened in the way and the time it did without you, your gifts, and your incredible support, thank you!
Melanie is an amazing coach! She has the ability to hold space, see things, say things, and guide you in a way that is clear, kind, loving, and spot-on. Her intuitive gifts coupled with her business savvy, make her a unique coach, with a valuable set of skills. She has had a profound impact on my life and my business since I started working with her – things have gone to a whole new level and I’m so grateful for the work we’ve done together.”
“Melanie, you have been my cheerleader and my sounding board throughout this soulful process. Thank you for keeping your promise to never blow sunshine up my ass, for drawing out my stories and doing so with such love, compassion and wisdom. ”
“Melanie has a natural grace and is a gifted teacher who shows you how to access your own core wisdom. She encircles you with intuition, light, kindness, clarity, practical advice and enables you to find your calling and navigate the obstacles along the way. It’s like having a cup of tea with your guardian angel architect as you manifest your dreams.”
“To my developmental editor, the ‘Book Shaman’ Melanie Bates, many thanks for your support, expertise, and strong belief that I could complete this project.”
“Melanie Bates, offering all of her wisdom, literary gifts, brilliance, candor and compassion has most literally transformed not only my career, but my life as a whole. Thanks to her, I’m never looking back, only forward… to employing my untapped gifts and talents, as well as the numerous ways that Melanie has coached me to ignite them.”
“You’re not only helping me with this book, you are also helping me hash out some important themes in my life. I appreciate your awesome process. I appreciate your candidness. I appreciate your ability to see beyond the words. I feel better about this book than ever before. The themes are coming to life for me and I feel great about where we’re headed. It’s starting to feel ‘real’, and I can sense a theme, focus, and direction now.”
“Writing a book was a dream of mine since my 20’s. For over 30 years, I started over and over again, but never followed through.
When I was introduced to Melanie, I had gotten past the initial inertia, but I was in serious need of guidance. Over the better part of the following year, Melanie helped me shape and complete a first draft. At the beginning, I could never have imagined the book that eventually emerged through our work together. The result is thrilling, unexpected, and best of all, I learned so much about myself in the process.
I wouldn’t be where I am now without Melanie’s help and support. She is a coach in the truest sense of the word. She grew my capability, guided me in new and exciting directions, and—when it was most needed—told me the tough truth.
It’s funny. When I tell people about my book, so many say, ‘I’m thinking of writing a book,’ or ‘someone I know is thinking about writing,’ that’s when I smile from ear to ear and tell them, ‘I know just who to call!'”
“I’ve experienced a deep sense of being witnessed in our time together as I work through healing aspects of my ‘story’ and of having a compassionate, intuitive, wise, inquisitive, and interested companion as I travel this journey. It is so deeply healing.”
“Melanie has been so helpful with motivation to keep writing, improving my craft, and much more. She has guided me to process emotions as I was writing through a lot of grief. I’ve realized things I know I never would have if it wasn’t for her, and I am beyond grateful. I’ve been to many therapists, and this coaching experience has been vital for my healing. I believe processing your thoughts through writing can be valuable, but sometimes you need an extra nudge in direction or motivation to move you forward. Thank you, Melanie!”
“When I was first introduced to Melanie, I had a calling to write my story—and not much else. I had no formal writing education nor degree, and I didn’t even understand why I wanted to write. All I knew was I wrote in a journal my whole life and that something inside me needed to be expressed. She told me from day one, ‘you are a writer.’ (Bless you!)
I’lI never forget sitting on the steps leading into my garage, looking for a private spot in my small house so we could talk on the phone for the first time. I told Melanie that I wasn’t interested in the fastest path to publish a book nor to make money
I already had a full-time, well-paid job. What I did want was someone to help me navigate the next steps in taking the words I had in my heart and putting them into a first draft.
I realize that many people may want (and don’t get me wrong, I want it too) a best-selling book. What was more important to me was having someone meet and understand the very unexplainable urge that I have to use writing and inner exploration work to better understand my life so that I can live better and share what I’ve learned with others. I once heard someone say that if you’ve survived something big, you have a story to tell to help others. This is my motivation.
The highlight of my month is connecting with Melanie. Not only does she create a safe space for us to create together, she allows me the opportunity to step back and look at my writing in a way that helps me better understand my life and who I am. I share the most intimate and embarrassing parts of myself through my writing and she embraces it without judgement and in a way that helps me to feel safe.
She has the most incredible talent of showing up and being present on our calls. When she is reviewing my writing, she connects dots, pulls out information that I didn’t quite see, and finds the most important and salient thing that is seemingly right in front of me that I didn’t realize was there. The result is not only better and more truthful writing, but a blueprint to my life that helps me decode myself so that I can pass that on to others. She has a way of seeing and knowing like no one else.
Melanie is special. And anyone who gets to work with her will not only learn how to write a book, but will learn who they are as human.”
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Melanie Bates2016-12-10 14:51:282017-11-08 16:35:43Is Writing Hard?Stay Connected & Get My Blog in Your Inbox
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