Are Dogs & Kids Just Mirrors of Our Own Energy?


So… my boyfriend has been insisting that we get a shock collar for the love of my life. (No way. Ever. Not gonna happen.) When I went searching for kinder options, I was floored to find myself looking in the mirror.

I should preface this blog by saying: I don’t have kids. Unless you count my three pups, which I do. Let me introduce you:



12-year old son of my boyfriend whom I adopted posthaste the moment I met him. He’s a silky soft Chiuahua who is both mean and sweet and highly introverted like his mom. I’ve never met a more regal dog and yet he follows me around like I’m the pied piper. He’s highly food motivated and would do anything for a piece of popcorn or a nibble of cheese. Beef? Forget about it. His favorite place in the world is cuddled up next to me on the bed. (Under the covers, of course.)



5-year old Yorkshire Terrier. Even folks who don’t like dogs, love So-Kr8z. Warning: He will lick the back of your throat with his Gene Simmons-esque tongue if you let him. He’s addicted to licking sheets and chomping on squeaky balls. He doesn’t play fetch. Nope, he plays keep away. He’s more emotional than I am sans hormones, and barks at a grain of dust, hence my boyfriend’s idea of the shock collar.



6-month old French Bulldog. She’ll put anything into her gaping maw: pebbles, cotton, sticks, my arm. She likes to bound off our bed, stumpy limbs outstretched before she lands on the floor to bite her brother’s tails. She races around the house like Mario Andretti, her big bum sliding into bookcases and knocking things off tables until So-Kr8z catches her and puts her in her place.



So… there they are—the loves of my life, but back to the non-high-voltage options. I found an article by Cesar Millan in which he said that barking is how dogs communicate. Indeed, yet for the past couple of years I swear So-Kr8z has been desperately trying to tell me something BIGGER—perhaps we have a ghost, or there’s a meteor hurtling toward earth, or maybe it’s been too long since his last trip to the S-paw.

“Bark, bark, bark. There’s a grain of sand. Danger! Bark, bark, bark. There’s a leaf blowing by. Danger! Bark, bark, bark. There’s a cell dividing somewhere. Danger! Bark, bark, bark, bark.”

Cesar went on to say that you can’t cure a dog from barking when your energy is frustrated. Oh, wow! You mean chasing So-Kr8z around the kitchen island in my robe screaming for him to shut up, while Chloé chases me and bites my ankles with her puppy piranha teeth, isn’t the right energy? He goes on to say, “your dog will mirror your energy…. take a moment to curb your own internal barking first.” Ah… I knew this. It’s no different than becoming the lead mare in my horse whispering experience with Koelle Simpson and Martha Beck. If my energy is insane, his will be too. For years I’ve told anyone who would listen, “So-Kr8z is very emotional. He wears his emotions on his sleeve.” Hmmmppfff, didn’t I just actually state that in my description of him above? “Hello there, mirror, nice to see you again.”

A few days later, forgetting all I knew, I watched Sancho guard the food bowl and bare his canines when So-Kr8z came near it. So-Kr8z whined and barked, “I’m starving, man. Cut me some kibble.” I couldn’t understand why Sancho was so protective. There’s never a moment in time when the food bowl is empty. He can have all the food he wants, day or night. The dogs actually have more food in the house than we do.

A few minutes later, hungry, I observed So-Kr8z going after every toy that Chloé picked up, regardless of the fact that there are always, at all times, at least thirty-plus toys on the floor. If she has a squeaky ball, So-Kr8z doesn’t care that there are five identical squeaky balls within a foot of him. He wants the one Chloé has. I couldn’t help but think: Sheesh. I don’t think dogs are very LOA savvy. It’s as if they believe there will never be enough, despite the abundance of evidence that there is always plenty.

Oh, you bastard of a mirror! I spend most days, at one point or another, worrying about not enough. There’s not enough time. I need to do this and this and this and this. I’m in school full-time. I coach all day. I run another business besides. I need to go to the store. I need to cook dinner. I need. I want. There’s not enough. I should.

And… not enough money. The bills are paid, but what if I don’t have enough next month? I have a plethora of clients, but what if they stop showing up? I have a beautiful home, but what if I end up living in a van down by the river, “eating a steady diet of government cheese,” despite my lactose intolerance? But what if? End up. Not enough.

[tweetthis]”‘Mirror, mirror on the wall,’ who has the most issues of all?”[/tweetthis]

Me? Or my dogs?

I’m guessing it’s not so different for parents raising kids. But, pray, do tell. Do you have experience around this with your children – furry or otherwise? How does your energy and your thoughts affect their behavior?

For my visual peeps out there:


6 replies
  1. Jeannette
    Jeannette says:

    Indeed, so much info to be gleaned about ourselves when we just look at what’s being mirrored to us in the rest of the world.

    Here’s to using that info for our continued conscious evolution! 🙂

    • Melanie Bates
      Melanie Bates says:

      Absolutely. DRAT, too! I forgot that I wanted to mention energetic hygiene too in here when you mentioned it the other day.

      Big love, my friend.

  2. lorilei
    lorilei says:

    Oh, Melanie — yes, yes, and yes …. I have both a pack of animals and a pack of children…Cesar Milan and my Reiki Training introduced me to the communication of energy, especially with animals and we see lots of this in pre-verbal children (though older children) but there’s this powerful tuning into “energy-communication” when you don’t have physical words (well, we always communicate in images first, the words are intended to help refine that communication — ….that could be a whole other topic) … When my husband and I had a rocky time, tough communication verbally but wildly energetic challenges protecting ourselves… my rat terrier mix was just out of control, now 3 yrs later she’s not quite calm but she’s very “responsive” per say to the energy, and she had abuse in her back ground (much like her momma – me) so the charged energy put her into a panic and she could never feel safe… As the dynamics with my husband and I have some to a openess and trusting-vulnerability, our rat terrier is sitting on people’s lap, I can address her when she is barking her head off to which after a few barks she will come over for some nice human affection, these are mile stones, things she would never do before…my animals are just great indicators of the _energetic atmosphere of my home… enjoyed your article, hugs to you, Lorilei (healing my own trauma from my childhood through consciously parenting my kids, but that’s a whole other entry….parenting the way I want to be treated, or I would see I would “parent through my childhood wounds” at felt at choice….so I took the chance and went for it.)

    • Melanie Bates
      Melanie Bates says:

      Wow, Lorilei, what great insight. I’m going to have to take a hard look at the entirety of the energy of my home and relationships. Thank you! And… KUDOS, my friend, for your conscious parenting. That is a truly beautiful thing to read.

      Big love,


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