“It’s Not You, It’s Me.”

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Ever heard this line? – “It’s not you, it’s me.”

I’ve heard it many times myself. In the past my typical response was usually, “Bullshit, you dick. Grow some balls, coward. I’ll do better. Fucker. Liar. Please don’t go. Bastard. Stay. Asshole. ” These utterances were usually followed by a week or so of tears, some cuddle time with Ben & Jerry watching reruns of Little House on the Prairie, a few tattoos so that I could feel the pain inside in a tangible way on the outside, the eventually donning of my Superwoman cape, heading out with my friends, my first few laughs post break-up, tequila, Jagermeister, Beam, Stoli O and cranberry juice with slivers of an orange, flying kites in thunderstorms, swimming in fountains, stealing tractors, sweaty soul train dance parties, and Journey concerts. Hey, everyone has their own personal process. Read more

Soul Mates: Fact or Fiction?

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I need your guts.

Ladies.

Gentlemen.

I need your gut instincts, your intuition, your introspection on a subject that keeps coming up for me.

Soul mates. Fact or fiction?

You see, I met a guy about ten years ago. I had no interest in dating at the time. I had just left a ten year marriage and was sewing my wild grains with a top o’ the line industrial sewing machine, threads of sinew, and my liver.  But I felt inexorably, inexplicably drawn to this person. We went our separate ways after our first meeting but we kept running into each other. Over and over and over. It was like “moth to a flame” shit. I would think about this Dude. Every. Single. Day. And… according to him, his words, his experience was the same.  It made no sense to either of us. When I looked into Dude’s eyes I was lost in some time-space continuum of I don’t know where or when. But our relationship was rocky, dysfunctional, messy, overwrought, too much. It was like Disney on an icy glacier after a couple bowls of meth. Read more

Glimpse of a Life Through Lyrics

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So I speak to you in riddles
‘Cause my words get in my way
I smoke the whole thing to my head
And feel it wash away (1)

Words speak and choose
make sense and lose
capsize the tall tale, but always fail
words speak and choose, make sense and lose
forfeit the tall tale, I always will (2)

I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am taffy stuck and tongue tied
Stutter shook and uptight
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am fine (3) Read more

Battery Power Low! Otherwise Known As God’s Little Voice Box

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I don’t want to freak you out or anything but God has been speaking to me through my fire detector.

It’s true.

Some people have vivid, colorful dreams of weathered hermits riding royal purple Yaks and wake up feeling inspired and motivated around their life purpose. Others make an omelet and see the face of Jesus in the burnt, crusty bits of Gouda and head out on a pilgrimage. Moses had the burning bush.

But, nope. Not me. I have a Kidde fire alarm. Read more

Confessions & Quests: Finding my Tribe

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I have a confession to make and I feel pretty damn vulnerable putting fingers to keys around it.

(No, I haven’t been watching The Bachelor.)

You ready?

I spent almost two decades of my life wishing I were Native American. What’s more is that, for many of those years, I didn’t consciously recognize it.  Essentially I just wanted to be of this culture as part of a tribe of a people and history that I looked up to.

Instead, I was born into a family of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) which traces back to my 4th or 5th Great Grandparents who lived near Joseph Smith and, upon his death, traveled with Brigham Young to Utah. While my family is amazing, the garments just never fit me and I’ve been searching, studying, and “trying on” different religions and different types of spirituality since I wore a retainer and a turtleneck with frogs smattered on it. Read more

The Gift of Clearing Clutter

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I’ve never been more in love. Since I was a tiny tot I’ve been an organizational freak and used to line up all my patent leather Mary Janes with level precision so that I could hide crackers and Halloween treats in them. My shoes are still lined up, though I now keep the crackers in the cupboard and the Halloween candy has its own drawer, so when I saw this 2012 Declutter and Organize Calendar on mysimplerlife.com I nearly passed out with joy.

Why is this the #1 gift you can give yourself in 2012? Well, I wrote about it a bit here but suffice it to say that when you’re surrounded by heaping mounds of crap it affects so many areas of your life; your spirit, your mental health, your ability to get stuff done, your energy levels. There are even health benefits in decluttering. Clearing your space of clutter opens you up energetically to expand (and even to receive more – though do you really need another pair of Jimmy Choo’s?) Read more